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Page 192
Moving from Perfectionism to Excellence
In transforming perfection to excellence, we take the previously selected elements of excellence and make the following alterations in the perfectionist's attitude:
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Knowledge and Excellence. We move from knowledge that confirms an air of superiority to knowledge that ensures adequate grounding in the trading discipline; learning to use knowledge to gain confidence and to ground skills rather than using knowledge to feel superior to others or to boast about one's intelligence and learning; learning to give up the narcissistic position of being the only one who knows, who is entitled to special attention and treatment.
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Compatibility and Excellence. Learning to choose the pursuits that are right for you, not just those that have status attached or reflect what your parents and friends think you should do; finding the work and projects that fit your personal style. From a viewpoint of "me against the world" to "we're in it together." Learning how to cooperate and be compatible with others for one's own benefit as well as for their benefit; going beyond gross forms of jealousy, envy, and vindictiveness to feelings of interest in and joy for the triumphs of others. From "there's only room at the top for one" to "there's room enough for everyone."
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Dedication and Excellence. From conditional dedication based on easy reward and low frustration to dedication based on personal integrity that demands one's best performance; moving beyond blaming others when it isn't easy; not quitting after failures; tolerating second best, if necessary; making use of constructive criticism.
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Motivation and Excellence. From motivation by fear of failure to motivation derived from personal satisfaction and achievement; moving from desperate performance to avoid shame to spirited, interested engagement with reward in both the process and the goal; from compulsively moving on without time to savor the achievement to allowing oneself full satisfaction without devaluing one's accomplishment. Making room for celebration of success as a way to gain nourishment for further challenges. The perfectionist's obsessive tendency can be used positively to sustain motivation despite distractions competing for his attention.
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Commitment and Excellence. From commitment based on short-term ego gratification to commitment based on strong investment in the skill or work itself. From surface-level narcissistic gratification to a

 
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