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Modes of Control: Assertive and Yielding |
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Research and the clinical experience of psychologists suggest there are two basic modes that people use to gain and maintain a sense of control. The first is an active, assertive, mastery mode and the second is a yielding, accepting mode (Shapiro and Astin, 1998). |
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It is common to think of control as only the first typeactive effort to gain mastery of ourselves, others. and the environment. We want to actively do something to influence the situation. Or we want to see others do what we want them to do. We think of this active form of control as being strong, assertive, and engaged in problem solving. And it is. |
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We tend to contrast this active mode with a passive, negative, and resigned "giving up" mode when we feel that we have too little control and are unable to do anything to gain more control. Yielding, because we fight against it, ends up feeling like a total lack of control. This is due to not having developed a way to reframe it in addition to our own Western cultural belief about the meaning of control. |
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Eastern psychologies and philosophies focus far more favorably on gaining a sense of control through the yielding mode, rather than the Western assertive mode. The interplay of asserting and giving in, active effort and effortless withdrawal, are viewed as complementary and both necessary parts of a whole. When one won't get the job done, oftentimes the other will. And this is especially true when it comes to gaining a sense of self-control while trading and investing in the financial markets. |
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In addition to our negative bias against the yielding mode, we go on to believe that disciplined investors want to have as much active control as possible, doing everything in their means to make things go the way they want them to go. We take "discipline" to mean active, assertive control, either by active doing or by active not doing. Both have the quality of effort attached to them. |
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What I mean by active not doing is that we include in this active control mode the ability to refrain from taking action, such as not impulsively jumping in to buy a stock that we don't know anything about. But even this holding back we view as an active, assertive self-restraint of our own part through "will power," or "self-discipline." My point is, it is still an active, attempt to control ourselves. And all active attempts are fine when appropriate but miss the mark when they're not. |
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